When another Australian Open has come and gone and, once again, there are no Australians in the final, then the only thing to do is throw away your ball. And your racquet …
When you wake up and a hot January sun is slanting into the verandah to reveal the detritus of last night’s debauchery, yet you know you must brace yourself and do it all again …
It must be time to get that southern cross tattoo you’ve always dreamed of. Yes, it must be Australia Day in Hamilton North.
Celebrate in moderation, cobbers.